Friday, April 2, 2010

Being a mom and having friends

Growing up and being an adult is hard. Being a mom is hard too. Now that I'm a mom I realize more than ever how important it is to have friends. I'm blessed to have a few really good friends, and I've met some incredible women over the past year.

Lately though, I've really been struggling. I have a few friends that I feel I try and try and try and its not reciprocated back. Or the friend I've grown up with and was best friends with her and then whenever you run into each other theres always something said along the lines of, "I'm really busy the next 2 weeks, but after that we should get together, I'll call you!" And then she never calls. And the next time you run into her again she says "Man do I ever miss you, we should get together, I'll call you." And she never does, so then I'll send an e-mail and get no reply.

Or what about the friend that you become really close with really fast. A year of being good friends goes by, you see each other almost every week, and then oddly a couple weeks go by that you dont talk and she stops answering your phone calls, or even better she doesn't return your phone calls, or mentions that she is really busy but maybe we could hang out another day.

Is there something wrong with me?!

Lastly, I'm sure you've all dealt with this one. The friend you grew up with, and have known each other pretty much forever gets engaged, you had a bit of a falling apart but since you guys have known each other for forever you dont think it would affect your relationship. She doesn't text or e-mail you anymore, and finally you find out your not invited to the wedding, but another mutual friend of yours was invited. The reason your given though always comes down to money and numbers. How do you not take it personally? How do you not let it affect your friendship in the future? Am I being childish?

Its hard staying at home with a baby, and some days only talking baby to the whole world. Some days I feel like my efforts are in vain, whats the point in trying to be friends with someone when they dont want to try or are too busy? And again, how do you not take it personally? Any thoughts?

Obviously, the above examples are ones that we've all dealt with, this isn't the first time I've felt this way or the last, however each time it happens its hard not to take personally.

1 comment:

Paige said...

I had a very wise woman once tell me (she lives behind the field from your parents!) that she struggled with this as well, as we all do from time to time... she felt that it was something that "forced" her to be even closer to her husband because, he had to be her best friend and the only one she could rely on... and really, that is the only way it should be.